Into 2010 We Go

The magic of Christmas has come and gone, the trees which once adorned our homes are in the garbage, and all the pretty lights have been stuffed away in the attic for the next eleven months. January has us in its sterile, icy grip. Trudging through a case of winter blues as I am, my eyes eagerly look ahead to spring.

This winter has been particularly severe, as was the one before it. Record cold weather has splashed across much of the northern hemisphere, and it seems everyone has something to say about it.

Enter the global warming hucksters who incessantly beat their drums. Now don't get all upside-down in your chair. Hear me out.

When the days are hot, said charlatans go into their mantra; when it's mild, they continue their chant; and when temperatures are abnormally cold, they keep right on yapping. Where is the logic in this? Oh sure, they'll tell you about "greenhouse gases" accumulating and point to charts which allegedly bear witness to their claims.

Let's assume CO2 levels have been increasing over the past 150 years. I live in an area nearly filled with large trees, trees which happily absorb all the CO2 they can get their leaves on. There are uncounted forests throughout the planet with similar appetites, comprised of trees that return life-giving oxygen for our exhaust gases.

Maybe there's a balance. Or maybe there's something else, something -- or someone -- lurking in the shadows.

Go grab some Pepto Bismol and consider Al Gore. If you need a minute, I'll be right here when you get back.

Regardless of how you voted in the 2000 presidential election, the man is a snake oil salesman. Now I don't intend to beat up on Mr. Gore, at least not specifically. There are a slew of like-minded folks who believe as he does. It is these people whom I have in my cross-hairs (figuratively, of course -- I don't intend to shoot anybody today). The media campaign is well funded and has, I am convinced, a sinister plot as its ultimate goal: to drain the wealth of the United States and spread it across the globe. Without sounding paranoid, I believe this is part of a coordinated effort to bring down this mighty country and usher in world domination by a single undisclosed entity.

Did you say UN? Please don't. They are inept and cannot enforce any of their own resolutions. Would you trust your 401k to such a band of humanist morons? Instead, I'd look to the most populous nation in the world as the greatest beneficiary of our downfall. Yes, others would benefit if we were to deplete the bullion from our treasury, and Jimmy Carter's empty mind would fill with glee at the mere thought of another altruistic (*cough*) global endeavor.

The marketing scheme has been incredible (perhaps that should read incredulous but the words diabolical and disingenuous also come to mind). The "scientists" who have been reeled in forgot all about the dire warnings of an impending ice age they issued in the late 1970s, and now they modify their terms to suit their financial needs. Remember "global warming"? Come on, get hip! It's been called "climate change" for a few years now since it takes into consideration any fluctuation in temperature, up or down; the mere perception of a change in the weather draws the naive to worship at its altar.

In the 1600s, a phenomenon known as the Maunder Minimum occurred. For more than seventy years, sunspots virtually vanished, and temperatures around the world plummeted to lows not seen since. Couple this observation with the noted heating up of the four terrestrial planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars) over the first half of the decade we just exited. The conclusion I arrive at is simple: Our planet's climatological destiny is at the mercy of the sun, not CO2.

But the fate of our country is at the mercy of the global warming quacks as well as the fraudulent media which promulgates true waste.